Parenting! I have found it is full of interesting joys and challenges!
I love to squeeze as much of the fun and magic I can out of the moments with my kids.
Christmas is one of my favorite times of year.
I just love all of the lights, smells, songs, and wonder of the season.
So, I find myself trekking to as many festivals, tree-lightings, and Santa sightings as possible.
I lovingly refer to them as Santa “stockings” ( or stalkings, whichever fits).
Unfortunately those “Norman Rockwell” moments are often shrouded with inevitable meltdowns, whining episodes and over-tired kids; ultimately “smearing the paint” on my lovely canvas of our beautiful holiday portrait.
I would love to say that “all was calm and all was bright”, however with a 2, 4, and 6 year old, it may have seem more like a continuation of Halloween fright to some of the festival patrons.
My girls decided to have a “cat-fight” in Fairyland, amongst the tingling lights of their beautiful incense infused “forest”.
Needless to say, we disrupted the tranquil atmosphere that all had tried to create, including me.
With the terrible 2’s in their full glory, I swiftly left with her nicely snug in the stroller, screaming all the way, and the other two upset they weren’t able to enjoy the rest of their winter fairy wonderland.
The saga continued…
As I got them in the car and sent my husband a loving text ” Dropping kids off. FYI, I’m done!”, I couldn’t help but wonder, as I often do, ” Does anyone else ever feel like this or is it just me and my kids in a whirlwind of craziness?”
Frustrated, disappointed and defeated we went home…
I knew a “mommy time out” was way over-due, so, I thankfully “checked out” and went to find my “oxygen mask”.
Off I went to get a holiday movie for them, still feeling that my mom fuel was very low.
One of the things that grounds and re-energizes me the most is going to the beach at sunset. So, off I went… As the sun began to set, breathing in the crisp clear air. I could feel the peace begin to settle in my disrupted soul.
I began to ponder the things that just happened.
Without wallowing in the past of what had occurred, the kids had bounced right back. My little two year old had long forgotten the tantrum or what it was about, the other two were onto other thoughts and activities, with smiles and laughter, and were off to certainly have a blast on their bikes as I had left.
They are so resilient and are so much more forgiving of themselves and others. Somewhere in our “growing-up” adults seem to lose this precious quality.
I am beginning to realize that the picture and the beauty of these experiences is expressed solely from my perception.
Even though this piece of art may not have all of the strokes perfectly painted, may be uneven and the colors may not seem to fit; the reality is, it’s my creation. Although the end result may not look like we imagined, it is in those ” imperfections” that life really happens.
Today, although I don’t feel like the mom of the year, or like I have the most angelic children, I am glad I took enough steps back, put the right “lighting” on my picture we created today to see the beauty of “messed up” strokes on our canvas.
It is our lives, our memories, our treasures.
May you see the beauty on the canvas of your lives.